‘Good
morning listeners. This is radio station KLX24. Thank you for tuning in to our
breakfast show. As you just heard on the weather report it is a beautiful clear
morning right across our city so it is time to get up and face another day.
Don’t go away as straight after these important messages we have a surprise for
you.’
‘If
you need more zip in your day try the revolutionary health tablets that are
making a great comeback after some, now discredited, assessments. Yes Mr Rudd’s
small, one a day, white tablets will get you zipping about in no time at all.’
‘For
relief from constant constipation we recommend Big Brother tablets. Just one
tablet a week will give you the desired results.’
‘Some
good advice there.’
‘My surprise. Well this morning we have our
much respected travel expert here in the studio with me. He is affectionately
known as the Travel Bug. Welcome home Jorn.’
‘Thank
you. It is very nice to be back again in familiar surroundings.’
‘Well
it is nice to have you back in our studio. We have all been following your very
informative weekly reports with great interest. Last week you had just left the
city of Madrid and were headed for London. You told us that you were expecting
some quite cold weather there, even the possibility of snow. So how did it turn
out?’
‘It
did not snow but I found the city rather depressing weather wise. For my first
three days there it rained constantly; not heavy, just a fine misty rain that
was most annoying. If anyone intends travelling there make sure you take a rain
coat and umbrella.’
‘What
were some of the things you experienced there, apart from the rain?’
‘There
are too many so I will just list a few. Their national dish of soggy potato
chips with vile tasting vinegar is memorable. If you enjoy pomp and ceremony
mixed with spine tingling excitement a high tea is not to be missed. A ride on
the overcrowded, non air-conditioned, underground train system on a hot steamy
afternoon is a sensory delight. There are many museums and historical sites such
as the Tower, where you can view endless corridors of shiny body armour, tens
of square miles of tapestries and learn a lot about the fact that in the past
it was very dangerous to be married to a king. For a more detailed description
of what to see and do your listeners will just have to buy my book, which will
be available on-line in a few days.’
‘You
have been away travelling now for over a year so you must have had some
interesting experiences and seen some wonderful things. Can you give the
listeners just a glimpse of what to expect in your book?’
‘Yes
it has been a fabulous time and you are right I have seen some amazing things.
Most of these I have spoken about in the book. I don’t want to give too much
away but...’
‘I
am sure that our listeners would like to hear just a few of the highlights’
‘Ok.
Just a few teasers.’
‘The
pyramids in Egypt; all that beautiful stone available to be recycled yet they
build their houses out of mud bricks. Walking along the ancient Roman Forum where
in the past they had a strange habit of loaning each other their ears. The
massive water fall at Niagara; why they didn’t harness it for hydro electricity
is a mystery. The new parliament house in Canberra; they buried most of it
under dirt to keep all the hot air inside. A Grand Prix car race in Monaco; I
must admit a bit of a disappointment after witnessing the traffic in both Rome
and Paris.
‘So
what is the next destination in your continuing travels?’
‘I
am booked to travel to the planet designated Epsilon 36 in the Sigma quadrant next
week. Unlike our planet, and the planet Earth where I have just been, it is
uninhabited by intelligent life, so it will be a very different experience.’
‘Well
a safe journey ‘Travel Bug’. Wow fifteen planets visited over the past 10
years. What a lucky man.’
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